Being Me…

and discovering that that is quite the roller coaster ride. Wanna come along?

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I am feeling down and I’m not sure why.  I am suddenly very interested in what my high school boyfriend is doing and I have no idea why – and why now?  Am I lonely?  Am I just feeling nostalgic?  And what triggered this?  Sigh.  I don’t know any of these things and it is frustrating.

I don’t feel depressed.  I actually feel sad.  And sadly, I don’t know how to cope with it.  I suppose that that is because I am on antidepressants and I think they cover a lot of my “down” times.  I don’t know.  I think I would feel better if I knew what was causing this, what the problem was.  At least if you know what the problem is, you have a better chance of fixing it.

Maybe it is that my birthday is in two days.  I will be 47 – gasp.  Well, it is better than NOT being 47!  And that isn’t a “milestone” – like 45 or 50.  I don’t know.  Aaargh.  I just want to feel better than this.

Well, this too shall pass.  The weather is supposed to be beautiful this weekend so maybe I will be able to get out and get some sunshine.

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Some weekends are just like that

This was a lovely weekend but we got very little done, really.  We did a few things – my husband called to arrange to sell our dead car (at the ripe old age of 19 years) for parts and to have it towed, and I went out for some “me time.”  I did do a little laundry and get groceries – you know, the basics.  Nothing else was accomplished.  I feel a little bad because, well, there are always things that need doing, but sometimes you need to just stop and enjoy family, football, and your hobbies.

Well, Andy and I are working on our motivation levels and every weekend can’t be filled with activity and productivity.  I’ve found that I need down time and quiet time, specifically, to recharge for both work and family time during the week.  I love my family but even with them I need time to myself.