Being Me…

and discovering that that is quite the roller coaster ride. Wanna come along?


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The world didn’t stop…but it should have

Sigh.  I know that this is part of life but it sucks.  My father left me a message Thursday that he needed to set an appointment for a time to talk when we wouldn’t be interrupted.  He said if it sounded ominous, it was.  That really started my imagination working overtime.  I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) so it takes very little to make me extremely anxious – needless to say, this made me so anxious I wanted to throw up.

Really, now that we’ve talked, I don’t feel any better.  Ugh.  He has stage 4 lung cancer – stage 4 due to his lymph nodes being involved.

Numb. Then so sad.  Then numb.  Then nauseated.  Then numb.  Then I want to curl up with my fuzzy blanket and cry.  And I’m 44.  I’m having trouble processing it all.

 

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