Being Me…

and discovering that that is quite the roller coaster ride. Wanna come along?


Goodbye and Good Riddance to 2015


Actually, that sounds a little harsh.  2015 was better to us than 2014, so I shouldn’t say “good riddance.”  It simply wasn’t that bad OVER ALL.  Losing my father to lung cancer was the one absolutely awful part of the year and did indeed result in leaving me rather stunned and depressed for most of the rest of the year, but over all I think it was an OK year.

I read more, and tried new (to me) genres.  I tried Coursera and succeeded in taking an entire course and doing well.  I tried a number of new studies that way, not necessarily successfully but it was good to make the effort.  I started a series of classes on Coursera in the last few months.

I also started crocheting again, once the shock and intensity of my father’s passing lessened enough that I could function again.  (I tell you, it hurts more than words can say to lose a parent – you know that that is the cycle of life but that doesn’t make it any less painful to experience.)

I’ve written more and started trying to keep up a writing/posting schedule on one of my other blogs.  (LOL maybe I should do that on THIS one!)  I haven’t been as faithful to it as I would like but at least the effort is there, and I saw enough success with it that I will continue that effort in 2016.

I’ve made a more concerted effort to see that my son feels less like his sister takes all of my attention.  I think it is working – he seems much happier and less upset.  My husband is helping with this and I think that we are doing better as a family, as the year ends.

I have stood up for both kids in school this year, advocating for them when they didn’t have the words or concepts to express what they were experiencing.  (Long story, but I successfully got my daughter back to her favorite teacher who adores her and works wonders with her and I got my son into a better situation and the school to recognize that not everyone works their best in groups.)

Losing my father was the low point of the year.  It took months for me to pull out of the stunned state I was in after his death.  Some days, I still feel like I can call him and talk to him – the realization that he is really gone is so painful.  It is finally starting to sink in that he is gone.  I’m trying to focus on the great memories we had together and that is helping.  I miss him and always will.

Anyway, this is good bye to a year filled with good moments, happy moments, and productivity, as well as sad, emotional, draining days.  As someone once told me, “You wouldn’t appreciate the sunny days, if you didn’t have the rainy ones.”  Good bye, 2015 – and welcome to a bright, hopeful new year!



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The countdown begins

We’ve had a remarkably nice Christmas this year.  We’ve taken it easy, celebrating at home and not traveling anywhere at all.  The kids have had plenty of time to enjoy new things and we’ve been able to enjoy being at home.  It has been rather quiet and I do miss my family but I LOVE the quietness.

Now we start the true countdown to a new year and new goals and new beginnings.  Now I can start thinking about what I want to improve and what I want to accomplish in 2016.  I also want to look back over 2015 and look at what I have accomplished.  It is important to consider what I have done with 2015 – so often I don’t recognize the things that I have accomplished.  I tend to spend time worrying over mistakes or things I WISH I had done.  Well this year, I want to recognize my accomplishments, no matter how small.

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Peace and quiet

Today was not extraordinary.  There was absolutely nothing outstanding about today – and it was lovely.  Some days all you want is a nice, quiet family day and today we had one.

We spent some time at my in-laws’ house, letting our daughter run around their nice fenced-in yard and letting our son enjoy a Titanic documentary on DVR.  That gave my husband and I time to visit with other adults, always a nice thing!

We also managed to get out to the shoe store to replace our daughter’s shoes that fit over her braces (AFOs) – boy is she hard on shoes.  She drags her toes sometimes, enough that it has an effect on the shoes, plus she just flat out runs a LOT.

Then we came home and had a nice afternoon and evening together as a family.  I ran up the street for fried chicken and after dinner, my husband and I played a game with our son, much to his delight.  He definitely is following in his father’s footsteps, with an interest in playing games.

All in all, a very nice, ordinary day.