Being Me…

and discovering that that is quite the roller coaster ride. Wanna come along?

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Ok, I’m stubborn – I admit it…

But I think I’ve carried it to whole new lengths.  It has taken me about four years to admit that I need help.  I started down the road to depression about four years ago – with the birth of my son.  It wasn’t the birth, exactly – it was the postpartum depression that followed.  And our lives have just been…rocky is one way to put it…since then.

For the most part, I have grit my teeth, stood straight, and carried on like Superwoman.  I’ve been supportive to my husband to husband through his depression to the best of my ability, I have carried on doing all the day to day things as best I could, and so forth.

Well, after four years of trying to “soldier on”, I’m thoroughly exhausted.  I don’t have any reserves anymore and that is a terrible thing for a mother – I started to add as a wife, but my husband is a big boy and he can take care of himself, thankyouverymuch.

This week I am seeking help, help outside of family and friends.  At least I do learn…eventually!  We’ll see where this takes me!

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Things I Enjoy (Part V)

76. Hugs from my husband
77. Reading letters
78. Soaking in a warm bath
79. Stretching
80. Hot tea
81. Riding horses
82. Swimming
83. Long walks
84. Sunny days
85. Windy days
86. Rainstorms (when I can stay in!)
87. Snow (when I don’t have to drive in it)
88. Music (of many different types)
89. Cuddling my babies
90. Roses
91. Carnations (they last a long time)
92. Flowers in the garden
93. Puns
94. Watching football with my husband
95. Walking on the beach
96. Coffee
97. Hazelnut creamer
98. Grilled cheese sandwiches with bacon
99. Pens – I just love pens (and paper)
100. Warm fuzzy socks

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Things I Enjoy (Part IV)

61. Sleeping

62. Watching forensics shows (Forensics Files, New Detectives, CSI)

63. Reading Pride and Prejudice

64. Silence

65. Christmas carols

66. Playing my flute

67. Going to bed early

68. Oatmeal with brown sugar, butter, and raisins (tastes like an oatmeal raisin cookie)

69. Time alone

70. Writing in my journal

71. Talking to friends

72. Doing things with girlfriends

73. Spending time with my sister-in-law

74. Going home for the holidays (mostly!)

75. Writing letters